Are You A Witch?

[apollinav]

I wasn't sure where to post this ficlet, or whether to post the ficlet at all.  So feedback is appreciated.  It's about 1,000 words.

I am not trying to make a political statement with this fic, and I’m not trying to be controversial.  It was inspired simply by a conversation with an adjudicator with the US Citizenship and Immigration Services.  And I’ve taken liberties with the process detailed in the fic.  My only thought to share is this: if you’re a natural-born citizen of the country of your choice, don’t take your privileges for granted.

“Are you, or are you not, a witch?” she asked a second time, and Hermione was dragged forcibly from her flashback of Ron asking her the same question by the sour official before her.

“Of course I’m a witch,” Hermione snapped back.  “Sorry,” she amended in a softer tone.  “I’m just very nervous about this.”

The grey-robed witch, sporting a flashy silver badge that read Officer Anderson, arched an eyebrow that easily bespoke, ‘You ought to be.’

“On what grounds?”

“Pardon?” Hermione asked, nonplussed.

“Were you born a witch?”

“Yes, of course,” Hermione easily answered.

Officer Anderson looked pleased and pulled a thin stack of golden Ministry paperwork from a file.  “Then this should be quite easy.  Fine then, Miss Granger, are you pure-blood or half-blood?”

Hermione’s brow creased slightly.  “Neither.  I’m Muggle-born.”

She watched with growing distress as Officer Anderson’s lips thinned in disapproval.

“Then you are not a witch by birth,” the officer announced simply.

“Of course I am!”  What a stupid question, Hermione thought.  Magic wasn’t something that had just popped her over the head one day.  It certainly wasn’t a prize won out of a cereal box, either.

“Miss Granger,” Officer Anderson said, in a voice that warned of growing impatience, “Your parents were both Muggles?”

“Yes, Ma’am.” She nodded.

“And until you were aware of your abilities, is it true that you believed you were a Muggle?”

“Yes,” Hermione replied warily.

“Then you were obviously not born a witch.  You adopted, not inherited, Magical culture.  It is simply a fluke of science that you became a witch.  We classify those of your kind as Magical on the grounds of Ability, not Birth.”  Sighing forlornly, Officer Anderson replaced the thin stack of golden parchment, and pulled out a heavy sheath of pistachio green parchment.

Hermione shifted uncomfortably in her seat, and strained to get a better look at the fine print on the paperwork.

“Well, I suppose if we start on this now, I may have to skip lunch, but at least we can get the ball rolling and put you into the system.  Mind you, this won’t clear you for full-Magical status - good Lord, that could take years - but at least your documentation will be in one file.  Also, if you think it would help your case, you might consider hiring a lawyer.  As a Muggle-born, some of this language may be unfamiliar to you, and a lawyer could help sort it out.  But that’s on your expense.  We don’t provide free legal counsel.  If you want to read up about the laws, you may be able to petition to see the legal library in sub-basement two of the Rutherford district office.  It would also be helpful, Miss Granger, if you also spoke Gobbledygook.”

Officer Anderson paused to take a breath and Hermione sat back, stunned.  

The war had ended.  Voldemort and his minions had been soundly defeated.  Yet Voldemort’s legacy lived on.  The Megalomaniac had heightened fears about state security, and raised uncomfortable questions about the right of Muggle-borns to call themselves wizards and witches.  So that even after his death, the questions lingered.  And eventually, the fear-mongering and blood-status debate collided during the first-ever Wizarding Census.    

“Now then,” Officer Anderson began politely, taking up her quill.  “How long have you been a witch?”

“I’m sorry?” Hermione asked, genuinely perplexed.  She was still stuck on the idea that she was not a witch by birth. 

“When did you start manifesting your ability?”

“Since I was four, I think?  So, maybe twenty-three years?”

Officer Anderson jotted down her answer.  “And since then, where have you resided?”

“Uh… Well, there was the house I was born in.  We were there until I was eight.  Then we moved to Kent.  And I went to Hogwarts at age eleven.  And my  Apprenticeship in Dublin immediately followed.  Then I moved to London, and I’ve been there ever since.”

Officer Anderson shook her head despondently.  “Oh no.  You’ve moved five times in the twenty-three years since manifesting magic!  I must say, Miss Granger, that doesn’t bode well for you.  The council might consider you to be unstable or risky.  You may be required to remain in your current residence for the next decade or two as a show of good faith.”

“But my flat’s tiny!  It's just a temporary place until I can get hired on by Hogwarts,” Hermione blurted.

“Already, your chances of getting full Witch-status are stacked against you, dear.  Moving now would put your case file in jeopardy.”

“Ma’am, just how long is it going to take to process my case file?” Hermione asked with a stone in the pit of her stomach.

“Realistically?  Probably twenty-five to thirty years, give or take.   First we’ll fill out an exhaustive inventory on your past, employment documentation, and demographic data.  Then that will get routed through our main office, and you will be assigned a case officer.  Your case officer will do periodic check-ups and inspections of your house and your use of magic, and make a determination as to whether you’re more Muggle or witch.  Then a decision will be made by the District Officer.  And if you choose to appeal the findings, that could hold up the process.  Once the determination is made, you’ll be required to take and pass an exam covering all aspects of magical life.  And if you pass, then you’ll be granted Magical status.  But don’t worry, as a witch, you’ll probably live until you’re 100.  So what’s a quarter-century here and there?  Remember, this is for the safety and security of our entire population.”

She sat back, dumbfounded, and stared at the pistachio paperwork that she just knew she would grow to hate.

“Question number three,” Officer Anderson began again…

 

Comments

[beffeysue.livejournal.com]

Wow! This puts things in perspective. That's about how long it can take to become a naturalized citizen, isn't it?

I would hate to think that I would have to jump through all those hoops, so, yes, I am grateful for my natural-born citizenship. My vote? Post it.

Beth

[apollinav.livejournal.com]

It can. It's a lengthy process. Most have to hire lawyers, even if they speak the language. And they have to prove their stable by living in the same place and it makes me wonder if people who are in abusive relationships don't leave because of it. Whereas I did nothing. I was just born here. Like I said, something not to take for granted.

[annietalbot.livejournal.com]

Post it. You know where!

[apollinav.livejournal.com]

It just didn't seem to fit in anywhere. Well, I guess that is what a snapshot is all about, but it didn't seem like most of the stuff I see on websites. But I posted it to OWL regardless.

Thank you.

[snuggle-slut.livejournal.com]

that's sad, evil red tape.

[apollinav.livejournal.com]

*nods* Especially the crap they give people about changing residences.

[dickgloucester.livejournal.com]

OMG - you made me seethe wiith fury. Annie's right - post it!

[apollinav.livejournal.com]

I posted it on OWL. I wasn't entirely sure how it fits in with fandom - and it doesn't, but if Annie thinks its worth throwing up there, then I bow to her better judgement.

The process is hellacious and disgusting. And it forces people to stay in places and with people that may be bad situations just to prove they're 'stable.'

[miamadwyn.livejournal.com]

Bloody brill.

[apollinav.livejournal.com]

Thank you dear.

[lovefromgirl.livejournal.com]

I have a new appreciation for those who actually try to become citizens of other countries.

Good gods. Good fic, too.

[apollinav.livejournal.com]

It's a lot of crap to obtain citizenship in the states. I don't know what other countries are like, but the level of hoops to jump through smacks of Xenophobia. Thanks, love.

[persevero.livejournal.com]

That is really quite scary - the wizarding world taking lessons from our dear muggle Government. Native-born citizen myself, but il_grifone and kids have dual nationality (half-bloods?). And friend-down-the-road has just taken his citizenship exam (presumably he's Muggleborn then) and I looked through the book of questions - and I couldn't do about half of them.

[apollinav.livejournal.com]

I didn't have to do a damn thing to get my citizenship. I was simply born here, like my parents were. But the entrance exam for naturalized citizens is no joke, and neither is the evaluation process and what the adjudicators look for in the process.

What sucks is when people work so damn hard to get their citizenship, and they're still treated like outsiders.

[christev.livejournal.com]

I'm glad you posted it both here and there. The radio program I listened to this morning was talking about qualifying for aid. Poor people who 'own too much,' for instance, an auto, are encouraged to get rid of such possessions in order to qualify. Then they tell the people to pursue employment options, but so often one of the first things they need to get to a halfway decent job is - you guessed it, the car they were just told to get rid of. Oppression comes in all shapes and sizes. As does the illogical boneheadedness of the oppressors.

[apollinav.livejournal.com]

There's something really sick about that.

[camillo1978.livejournal.com]

I love this. It's a lovely cutting mix of RL and Potterdom I can completely imagine it happening post-DH. It would make a wonderful longer fic, you know...

And the Intended and I found out recently that as far as the Italians are concerned, he's an Italian citizen resident in the UK, despite the fact he was born here and has lived here for his entire 31 and a bit years. All hail the European Union, although we still don't dare ask any British authorities whether they think he's a British citizen ;-)

[apollinav.livejournal.com]

Even when he was born there? That seems so... bizarre to me. There's so much red tape involved it's amazing, and after I talked to one of the adjudicators about what he looks for, it's not a walk in the park either. Everyone is treated with suspicion. How's that for a warm welcome?

[elise-wanderer.livejournal.com]

Brilliant! Horrifying, but brilliant! And you did what great fiction does--opened an eye or two to reality!

[apollinav.livejournal.com]

Thank you, but it's kind of an awkward piece regarding where it fits in with the rest of most fanfic pieces. I took Annie's advice and posted to OWL.

[natasnape.livejournal.com]

One must wonder why would anyone want to go through that at all. I am an immigrant and have been over the last decade (moving about three times every two years), but fortunately laws are insane in a different direction here.

[apollinav.livejournal.com]

There are benefits. I don't believe that a non-citizen can draw social security benefits, but gets taxed for them. I'm sure there are other reasons than purely financial or else there wouldn't be so many trying to get citizenship.

[natasnape.livejournal.com]

The US is effectively a mythical country where everything is possible and everything is good. Who wouldn't want to live in a fairy tale? So I understand the psychology. The myth is powerful and appealing and I personally succumbed for a year too. However, reality is markedly different, yet people still try to get through the system as if they did not have a choice like Hermione here.

You were not trying to make a statement with this story, but I react as if you were. The story was very effective.

[apollinav.livejournal.com]

It's not perfect, but it's home.

[kierkegaardwife.livejournal.com]

I'm so glad I only have to deal with the happy, "You win. Now go get an SSN" side of this situation. It would make me so sad to tell people, "sorry for your luck." (Even though I do that quite a lot, too.)

Oh, and to add to the previous discussion, it is possible for a non-citizen to receive benefits from the SSA. Well, I know for sure they can receive SSI, at any rate. In my area, we don't have a lot of non-citizen activity, and when we do, they're usually lawfully admitted permanent residents.

Awesome little fic, really. I'm glad you posted it. And I'm glad you're feeling better!

xx

[apollinav.livejournal.com]

Thank you love. This is why you are the expert. I had no idea they could qualify for SSA beneies.

[kierkegaardwife.livejournal.com]

Well, after four weeks (and two pay checks!), I'm hardly an expert, but if we're going to be socialists, let's not play favorites, I guess. LOL.

xx